health men's health Sex Sexual Health

Penile Implants: What Makes a Good Candidate and What to Expect

A penile implant is used to treat erectile dysfunction (ED), a medical condition that prevents men from getting and sustaining an erection firm enough for sex. Although it was once thought that the cause of ED was psychological, we now know that actual medical problems are most often responsible for ED.  Common causes of ED include:

Penile Implants: What Makes a Good Candidate and What to Expect
  • Hormonal: Testosterone is produced by the testicles, and various hormones in the brain are responsible for “telling” the testicles to create testosterone. In some instances, however, problems that affect the pituitary gland impact testosterone production. Atrophic (small) testicles may also hamper testosterone production. 
  • Neurologic: Diabetes, a spinal cord injury, and other neurologic disorders may affect nerves related to erectile function. 
  • Vascular: Vascular disease, a condition that causes abnormal blood vessels, is among the leading causes of ED. It may also be a symptom of heart disease.  

For men who believe they are dealing with ED, a diagnostic evaluation is critical. The evaluation includes a physical exam, as well as a review of a patient’s medical history. It may also include hormone testing and other tests depending on the patient’s perceived symptoms and the physician’s findings from the initial physical exam. 

In many instances, ED is treated with oral medication such as Viagra®, Levitra®, or Cialis®. Another treatment for ED is a vacuum pump device placed over the penis that increases blood flow to the penis and is removed after a man gets an erection. This is then followed by the placement of a constriction ring at the base of the penis to help maintain the erection by “keeping the blood inside the penis”. ED injections are also available, which involves a small amount of medication injected directly into the side of the penis. 

In addition to the aforementioned ED treatments, a penile implant, also cause a penile prosthesis, can help men with ED have sufficient rigidity to have sex. There are two types of penile implants: semi-rigid and inflatable. A semi-rigid penile implant is always fairly firm. In contrast, an inflatable penile implant is inflated to help a man get an erection and deflated at all other times. 

It is important for men with ED to understand the risks associated with penile implants. Common risks associated with penile implants include:

  • Infection: If a man with an implant gets infected,  involving the implant, antibiotics alone are not adequate treatment.  In general, the implant needs to be replaced or removed. 
  • Implant Issues: If a penile implant ever malfunctions, surgery may be required to remove, repair, or replace the implant. 
  • Implant Erosion: A penile implant can rarely erode through the skin and when this happens, the implant must be removed or replaced.  This is more common with semi-rigid implants.

We have noticed that many men are very much encouraged to pursue penile implants early in their treatment, often without first being clearly advised of all alternatives.  We consider a penile implant to be a “wonderful last resort”. 

For men who choose penile implants to treat ED, penile implant surgery is available. Prior to penile implant surgery, a patient is given intravenous antibiotics. Then, one of two approaches is used to perform the surgery: infra pubic or penoscrotal. Infrapubic surgery involves an incision made at the top of the penis, and penoscrotal surgery involves an incision made at the base of the penis’ undersurface, which is our preference. 

Like any surgery, there are risks associated with a penile implant procedure. Potential penile implant surgery complications include perforation of the proximal tip of the crura (tip of the penis; the point where the penis joins the pelvis) and cross-over (occurs when the implant is on the left side at one end and “crosses over” to the right side of the other end). Urethral perforation may also occur, wherein the penile implant surgery may need to be aborted to prevent infection. 

No penile implant surgery is risk-free, but the surgeon who performs the procedure plays a key role in its success or failure. By choosing an experienced surgeon with proper Fellowship training and expertise, a penile implant surgery patient is well equipped to minimize risk and achieve the best results. 

Following penile implant surgery, patients generally are admitted to a hospital for a “23-hour stay.” Patients receive antibiotics at this time, and their status is monitored. Patients are then instructed to avoid strenuous activity for the first week after surgery, and a follow-up appointment is requested the week after treatment. A penile implant surgery patient then meets with his doctor approximately six weeks after treatment to receive insights on how to use the implant and engage in sexual activity. 

The Bottom Line on Penile Implants 

There is no one-size-fits-all treatment for ED. Fortunately, men with ED can meet with a doctor to learn about the treatment options at their disposal. By discussing different ED treatments, a man can choose one that limits risk and delivers long-lasting results. 

Penile implants are among the top options for men dealing with ED. A doctor may recommend a penile implant if a man dealing with ED previously found that medications or a vacuum pump device failed to deliver the desired results. The doctor can then teach his patient about the pros and cons of penile implants and determine if he is a good candidate for penile implant surgery. If both the doctor and patient believe penile implant surgery is the right choice, they can work together to make the surgery a success. 

At The Center for Reconstructive Urology, we offer a malleable penile implant, Ambicor AMS penile prosthesis, or an inflatable 3-piece penile prosthesis to penile implant surgery patients. Before treatment, we meet with patients to discuss all ED treatment options, as well as explain how penile implants work. As a Center of Excellence that has been exclusively devoted to the treatment of males with sexual-genital and urethral disorders for over 20 years, men have traveled to us from over 46 stages and 27 countries for care.  We are often contacted by men seeking to come to us for penile implant surgery, and their first question may be “what is the cost of a penile implant?” or “how long is the wait time to be seen for a penile prosthesis surgery?” etc.  In many cases, those who contact us are thinking they can and should come to our Center, and have surgery that day or the following day.  We are aware of certain “high volume centers” supported by manufacturer support, that function this way.  The Center for Reconstructive Urology and Dr. Gelman have never accepted any industry support.  This can be verified (for any doctor) at:

 In many cases, when we first correspond with men who contact us seeking surgery, we find that they really have not explored all options.  Therefore, it is our practice to first ensure all non-surgical options are first considered, and then we proceed with surgery scheduling when appropriate.  To learn more about penile implants or to make an appointment with us, you can contact us online or call us at 714-456-2951.

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Relationship Safe Sex Sexual Health

10 Reasons You Bleed After Sex, According to Doctors

It’s not exactly a subject you want to talk about. However, many women experience it. If you bleed after sex, there’s a reason for it. In fact, there can be several reasons. Seeing blood freaks out most people, but let’s calm down, and keep reading.

10 Reasons You Bleed After Sex, According to Doctors

At some point, almost 10 percent of all women have experienced post-sex bleeding.

If you’ve ever noticed blood following sex, doctors say there are legitimate causes. Medical experts have listed 10 common explanations, says a report in Best Life.

1. First Sexual Experience. If you’re a virgin and having sex for the first time, bleeding can occur. The hymen is a tissue layer covering part of the vagina. When the hymen is broken through sex, bleeding can result.

2. Vaginal Dryness. Here’s another reason for finding blood after sex. Dryness of the vagina does not produce enough natural lubrication. Penetration can cause tearing. Doctors recommend using personal lubricants and having adequate foreplay first.

3. Rough Sex. Some women notice it after a wild romp in bed and/or with a partner who has a large penis. Both can cause tears in the vagina, pain and some bleeding.

After sex, some medical experts advise taking a cool shower and wearing a pad.

4. STI Disease. A sexually transmitted disease like chlamydia or gonorrhea can lead to inflammation of the cervix area. Bleeding can result along with itching, abnormal vaginal discharge, etc.

A gynecological appointment should be made to treat the condition.

5. Cervix Polyps. This is rarely a malignant condition. It can create bleeding when the penis is pushing up against these growths. The polyps are like fleshy growths, says the Merck manual.

The polyps don’t cause symptoms until after sex. They can be found during a pelvic examination. 

6. Menopause Factor. When a woman reaches menopause, her body goes through various changes. It’s normal for vaginal tissue to become thin and less supple. A menopausal woman can bleed after sex. Medical professionals recommend foreplay and personal lubricants.

7. Eczema/Dermatitis. A genital rash in the vaginal area that comes from eczema or dermatitis can cause you to bleed after sex. If itchy, scaly rashes are noticed around the vagina, a visit to the dermatologist can help.

8. Menstruation. Sometimes, a woman’s period starts during sex. However, it isn’t the sexual act creating the blood. It’s coming from the monthly flow.

9. Cervical Ectropion. Another of the common reasons for post-sex bleeding is a harmless condition called cervical ectropion. It involves the delicate cells of the cervix. Instead of being inside the cervix, these cells appear on the outside. There are treatments to help.

10. Vulvar Condition. Two common culprits could be causing tears at the vaginal opening. Lichen planus and lichen sclerosus are autoimmune diseases that can result in post-sex bleeding.

Doctors advise scheduling a gynecological visit when you experience bleeding post-sexual intercourse. Don’t suffer in silence. There are treatments to relieve symptoms, so you can enjoy a healthy sexual lifestyle.

Relationship Sexual Health

Ask a Sex Therapist: Why Is It So Hard to Make Eye Contact During Sex?

Gazing into your partner’s eyes while making love adds intimacy. Still, for some people, it can cause anxiety. According to sex therapist Vanessa Marin “most people” find it difficult to make eye contact during sex, even for just “a few seconds.” 

Ask a Sex Therapist: Why Is It So Hard to Make Eye Contact During Sex?

She confirms that eye contact during sex is “one of the most vulnerable things” you can do with a lover. Since people reveal a lot about themselves through their facial expressions and in their eyes even nonsexual eye contact with someone can be difficult. People invite interaction, indicate attentiveness, and get the feeling of truly being seen when they make eye contact with others. 

Thus when we make eye contact during sex and pair these two intimate activities it raises the level of intimacy to higher levels. This can be challenging. If you want to get better at eye contact during coitus, there you have options.

First, try making better eye contact with yourself. Try standing in front of a mirror and looking yourself in the eyes. Do this often and try to hold eye contact for a longer period of time for each session. 

Practice with strangers. When you buy your morning coffee, make eye contact with the barista when you say “thank you.” When you go out for a meal, look your server in the eyes when you order. 

If this is too much for you, go on YouTube. Find vlogs where the speaker talks directly to the camera. Practice making eye contact with the speaker. The speaker obviously will not know you’re doing it so it’ll be easy.

Here’s another tip from a sex therapist. Look at the bridge of people’s noses. They’ll think you’re actually looking into their eyes but you’re not so it won’t make you feel vulnerable. 

Finally, ask your lover to discuss making eye contact and say you want to practice. Then, when you’re both ready to practice, find a comfy spot outside of your bedroom and sit facing each other.

Practicing outside the bedroom separates it from the act of sex. You’ll feel less vulnerable. Now take a couple of deep breaths, close your eyes for a moment to clear your mind then open them again and make eye contact. 

Practice working up to a few seconds at a time. Slowly close your eyes if you feel as if you have been making eye contact for too long. Allow yourselves to take brief breaks for a few seconds whenever you need to do so. Allow yourselves to giggle.

Even with these practice sessions, making eye contact might still make you feel very vulnerable. You might only be able to do it for a few seconds at a time. So don’t be too rough on yourself. 

Making eye contact at any time can make you feel vulnerable and very open. Making eye contact while making love can be even harder because you are opening yourself up both body and soul. Just remember, practice makes perfect.

Sexual Health

Wanna Have Funnier Sex? These 10 Expert Tips Will Help You Get Started

 It’s not easy for most of us to talk about intimacy, sex and the bedroom. Yet, you wonder how to keep things exciting. Many people like to read about amping up their love lives. They admit they enjoy their partner and have a great connection. However, they want more, like funnier sex. Human sexuality experts say it’s healthy to introduce new exotic (kinky) moves to the bedroom.

Wanna Have Funnier Sex? These 10 Expert Tips Will Help You Get Started

10 Expert Tips To Try:

1. Hello, Handcuffs.

Well, you don’t have to invest in a pair of handcuffs. The point is, however, to tie your partner up. You could use silk ties or pretty scarves. Sex educators call this light bondage.

Women, especially, seem to like the idea of being desired through restraint. 

2. Light Spanking.

One sex blogger recommends beginning with a light tap. You want to see how your partner responds. Studies show that one-quarter of Americans have this fantasy. They want to be spanked during sex.

3. Introduce Toys.

Some relationship experts advise bringing in a third party. Introduce a sexual toy or two. These gadgets look weirdly interesting. Props can add spice and laughter in bed for funnier sex.

You can use a sex toy on one partner or use it together. 

4. Sweet Treats.

Nothing says delicious and dreamy like introducing treats during sex. It’s playful and can be a blast.

For instance, try painting each other with liquid chocolate

5. Bedtime Stories.

Here’s another way to put a smile on your face. Some couples recommend reading out loud from an erotic novel. You could also watch steamy scenes from a naughty movie.

You could even make up your own sexy bedtime story. 

6. Fantasy Play.

Some couples enjoy pretending they are other people in positions of control. It’s called role playing. Some of the popular characters you can assume are a nurse to the patient or a teacher to the student.

7. Cancel Noise.

You’ve heard of blindfolds to create excitement. Why not try earplugs? The idea is to cancel out noise. It creates a submissive role for one partner. They watch your lips move. It can be a pleasurable game.

8. Friendly Competition.

You don’t have to play an entire game of Monopoly in bed. However, games can be sexy and fun. Play Scrabble or poker, for example. The winner receives a backrub or a sexual favor. You can create your own sensual rules.

9. Tickle Tease.

Tickling can be arousing for many couples. All it takes is a light touch from a prop like a feather, silk tie. Use gentle teasing sensations for buildable passion.

10. Create Code-Word.

When you and your partner want to engage in funnier sex, have a code-word. For example, “lobster roll” could be the code-word for let’s get kinky. That means you’re both on the same page.

Intimacy in the bedroom doesn’t have to be boring. You can spice it up with simple, little moves. Try our tips, and roll into bed laughing.

Relationship Sexual Health

What to Know About Sexsomnia, the Sleep Disorder Where You Have Sex in Your Sleep

Wake up to the reality of sexsomnia, a rare sleep disorder where you have sex in your sleep. It’s one of several parasomnias. Parasomnias are abnormal, disruptive, habitual activities that happen during and between stages of deep sleep. What causes this specific sleep disorder? 

What to Know About Sexsomnia, the Sleep Disorder Where You Have Sex in Your Sleep

Symptoms and triggers
Sexsomnia is more an erotic dream and more than some hot, hazy morning mating. Individuals with this disorder experience regular occurrences of masturbating, moaning, pelvic thrusting, and initiating coitus with whoever’s lying beside them, all while asleep. According to a 2017 study found in the journal “Sleep,” males are more likely to suffer from sexsomnia than females.

Male sexsomniacs will generally attempt to initiate lovemaking with a partner.Female sexsomniacs generally take matters into their own hands and masturbate. The behavior is reportedly amnesic and thus they occur in a confused, partially physically awake state and will not be remembered once the sufferer truly awakens. This particular parasomnia may also occur along with any other parasomnia. 

What triggers sexsomnia?

Any behavior that will interfere with a healthy, normal sleep pattern like too much caffeine too close to one’s bedtime, drinking alcoholic beverages, not getting enough sleep or even just a constant irregular sleep schedule can trigger this disorder. Dr. Alex Dimitriu, the founder of the Menlo Park Psychiatry & Sleep Medicine treatment centerin New Jersey told the press that seizures, sleep apnea, seizures, or REM behavior disorder can also influence it. 

Additionally, anxiety, depression and a lack of sex can impact on the frequency of the episodes. Sleep disorders like this can also be made worse by some psychiatric and other medications. Too much stress can also be a relevant factor and the condition is said to run in families.

Are sexsomniacs cursed?
There’s no real cure. Still, there are things one can take to reduce the frequency of occurrences or even stop it. Those who sleep next to sexsomniacs can frequently halt an episode by either pushing the sufferer away or simply not responding.

Sexsomniacs can make a concentrated effort to improve their sleep quality, lower their stress levels, have more sex while conscious and reduce nighttime alcohol and drug consumption. Prescription medication is another option. Clinical sleep health educator and the founder of the online site Insomnia Coach, Martin Reed reports: 

“Paroxetine is a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor . . . may be helpful” because it can reduce nighttime erections, increase deep sleep, and lower the occurrence of nighttime awakenings.” Another potentially helpful drug used for various parasomnias is Clonazepam. Doctor Dimitriu concludes that any treatment should start with eliminating the triggers.

Having sexomnia is nothing of which to be ashamed. Sexomnia makes you have sex in your sleep due more in part to random brain stimulation than something personal. As mammals, one of a human’s strongest biological drives. Choosing to actually treat this sleep disorder comes down to whether these specific animal instincts are an issue for the individuals who have the disorder and the partners they sleep beside every night.

Sexual Health Women’s Health

Why Does IUD Insertion Hurt So Much? Things Your Doctor Won’t Warn You About

IUDs have been surging in popularity among reproductive women in recent years. They have become favorites among other contraceptives due to their mistake-proof and long-term solution. IUD Insertion offer up to 99 percent effectiveness. The copper IUDs, in particular, are non-hormonal, making the perfect choice for most women when avoiding hormonal interruptions. With all these benefits, there is undoubtedly a downside to IUDs that doctors won’t tell you about. Most women opting to have UIDs are concerned with the pain that comes with UID insertion.

Why Does IUD Insertion Hurt So Much? Things Your Doctor Won’t Warn You About

Do all women experience pain?
Research has shown that different women experience insertions differently. The procedure takes about two minutes and may range anywhere from painless to extremely painful. Since most women head to the doctor’s office with the assertion that the process will hurt so much, it often becomes less painful than expected.

Why is the insertion process incredibly painful?
While getting to understand why IUD insertionis painful, it’s essential to get a clear idea of the entire procedure. Your doctor will request consent from you to proceed with the insertion of the IUD. Similarly to how a pap smear is conducted, your doctor will insert a speculum to open up the birth canal and hold it open. He or she will then disinfect the cervix to prevent infections and stabilize the area with a tenaculum. Stabilizing the cervix may tag a cramp or a painful pinch.  

The second phase of the procedureinvolves measuring the cervical canal and uterus. You might experience a second cramp here. Once your doctor determines that your uterus is large enough to accommodate the IUD, he or she will proceed with the IUD insertion. You might feel some cramp or discomfort when the IUD gets inserted. It’s common to feel lightheaded after or during the procedure. Some doctors administer medication to contain the discomfort or cramps felt during the insertion procedure.

Tips to make the discomfort more bearable
Heat therapy
Once you are through with the insertion process, consider trying heat therapy if your lower abdomen tends to hurt so much. Using a heat pad or hot water bottle, place it on your abdomen to release tension in the muscles, and relieve discomfort.

Your doctor recommends that you rest after insertion to reduce more irritation and allow the IUD to settle in the uterus. Although you could resume normal activity immediately after the insertion, your doctor may suggest that you take time off for one or two days, including sexual activity.

If you experience any extreme inflammation in the abdomen after the procedure, consult your doctor. Inflammation accompanied by heavy bleeding could be a sign of an expelled IUD or perforated uterus.

Talk to your doctor before the procedure. He or she may give you the confidence you need to undergo the process of insertion without anticipating discomfort. If there is inflammation, it takes only two minutes to get past it. According to statistics, a significant number of women with UIDs inserted are satisfied.

men's health Sexual Health

I’m an Actual 40-Year-Old Virgin. Here’s What That’s Like

When people find out that I am a 40 year old virgin, they usually can’t contain all of their questions that burst forth. One of the biggest ones I am asked is what my life is like without physical romance in it. I like to joke that you could ask the same question of a couple who have been married for over 20 years. A man virgin is something that most people just can’t comprehend.

I’m an Actual 40-Year-Old Virgin. Here’s What That’s Like

I can easily joke about my decision to abstain from all things physical until I am married because I am 100% comfortable with my choice. While I attended a coupled of Christian churches throughout my life, their messages all remained the same- it is better to wait when it comes to making love. Religious abstinence is often a reason why a man or woman refrains from this activity.

Of course, it isn’t easy being a 40 year old virgin in today’s world. The jokes and jabs are endless when other guys find out I haven’t been to bed with anyone. Women are shocked to hear that I can actually keep my hands off of them. It sucks to be judged for something that doesn’t have anything to do with anyone else. And yes, there are days I feel very lonely, and sometimes I’ve caught myself wishing I had a “friend with benefits” to turn to.

When I was growing up I spent a lot of time being bullied. While I got used to the idea that I was already different, I still wanted things to change. When I was a freshman in high school, I knew it was time for a switch. I headed to a Christian school and became very active in our church. Staying busy coupled with my religious teachings made it easy to stay away from my carnal urges.

I ended up working various jobs after college, always staying as busy as possible. I have always been upfront about my choice to stay abstinent. Honestly, there are reasons why celibacy can actually be good for you, such as a decreased risk of catching an STD. While I do get a lot of questions and jokes about my decision, it hasn’t caused me to change my mind in any way. I’m doing what is best for myself and my life.

I do browse the more popular dating apps online, such as Tinder and Bumble. I’ve noticed that most of the users on these apps are looking to meet up for just a quick hookup, so I have never bothered to pursue any of the matches. I know that I am simply not ready to be in a relationship yet. I’m also confident that when the time comes, I will be ready to dedicate myself to one woman and one woman only. When that happens, then maybe the chastity belt will come off. While I’m waiting and looking, I am content knowing that I am living my life to the fullest. That is what matters the most. Being a man virgin may be difficult in today’s world, but it is simply who I am.

Sex Sexual Health

Has Intimacy Gone So Far Out Of Style That It’s Poised For a Comeback?

There’s a new potential trend dawning: intimacy. Mind you, trends don’t always have the best timing. People went crazy over disposable baby food pouches yet simultaneously stressed over plastic pollution. The touch trend isn’t any different.

Has intimacy gone so far out of style that it’s poised for a comeback?

Sexting has replaced making out in the backseat. University faculty handbooks recommend all male professors meet college co-eds with their office doors halfway open. It’s as if more folks are writing about consensual sex than there are folks actually having it.

The “you do you” culture has inspired a market that pushes self-love as a sufficient stand-in for actual intimacy offering everything from Hygge blankets to sex-doll brothels. The message is: If no one else will touch you, touch yourself!

Trend predictors watch for endgames that signal the birth of something new and saturation points at which nothing else will be welcomed in the market. Some say that point came last year with Gatebox. Gatebox is a digital girlfriend who resides in a glass cube. The commercial evokes the existential dread of the Joaquin Phoenix sci-fi movie “Her.”

Unfortunately, spontaneous touches fell out of favor. Formerly sexually active people stay home with a vibrator and watch “Game of Thrones.” Could this mean that these folks no longer remember how to go about touching others?

Dating apps told us having a third-party interloper (i.e. a touchscreen) is the most empowering move people can make. Online dating does have benefits, but it also can decrease one’s fluency in social cues, create option paralysis, and the tendency to reduce humans to avatars. What can be done to fix things?

In order to orchestrate a comeback to intimacy, some people have been trading in their smartphones for dumbphones. Facebook has reported recent issues. Millions of users have chosen to click on “deactivate.”

Still, even if “offline” is the new black, that doesn’t mean everyone is going to jump into one another’s arms. They might not know how anymore. In fact, some are turning to professionals for a compensated touch.

For example, “professional cuddling” has gone from “that’s too stupid to be real” to a service for which Siri can look up a local address. has more than 621,000 companions you can rent by the hour for various events. Sex therapy is also becoming not only viable but even potentially superior to couple’s counseling.

Indeed, Walter Brackelmanns, a sex therapist, reported that in the case of his practice, the divorce rate was only five percent, which suggests sex therapy is effective. Some trend predictors suggest the status quo may be swinging from “Don’t touch me!” to “Oh! Please touch me again!” Should we expect the launching of body language clinics?

Picture a welcome comeback complete with “pheromone-based” dating and prolonged eye contact becoming more popular than SoulCycle. Even those in the know have yet to grasp how we would accomplish this. Perhaps, for now, it’s enough to look forward to a time when people turn from spending a lot of time just thinking about sex to actually having it.

Sexual Health Skin Care

A Little-Known Skin Disease That Can Disrupt Your Sex Life

Lichen sclerosis is an inflammatory skin disease that usually manifests itself as a white crust on your genital tissues. If misdiagnosed or undiagnosed it can screw the sex lives of those afflicted. It mainly forms on a woman’s vulva or less frequently on the man’s penis. 

A Little-Known Skin Disease That Can Disrupt Your Sex Life

It causes intense itching and pain. Treating it is often difficult as even physicians can sometimes mistake this skin disease for a common yeast infection and prescribe the incorrect treatment. When women beyond menopause report that vaginal pain is making coitus impossible, physicians sometimes think it is little more than common age-related changes and don’t notice the presence of this disease.

Doctor Anuja Vyas, a gynecologist at the respected Baylor College of Medicine confirmed that sometimes gynecologists don’t “even look at the vulva” which is a frequently infected area. In The Journal of Nurse Practitioners, nurse practitioners, Laura Johnson, and Nicholas Wedel noted that if vulvar lichen sclerosis is left untreated it “can cause significant physical, emotional and sexual discomfort.” 

Impact on sex lives
While it is not life-threatening, it can impact sex lives. Specifically, it can lead to irreversible devastation of your genital tissues. While it’s not transmitted sexually or contagious, as this goes to press there is no definitive cure or even established cause.

The condition rarely improves without treatment. It may actually be autoimmune in nature. More specifically, your body mistakes the mucous membranes and skin for “foreign tissue” and attacks it.

While lichen sclerosis can happen at any age, it generally impacts pre-pubescent girls and post-menopausal women. This could mean that a low level of one’s sex hormones could be involved it its start. There is also probably some type of genetic component.

Vyas reports that as many as one in 30 postmenopausal women and one in 300 of all women may be afflicted throughout a lifetime. It can alter the structure of a woman’s genital tissues. This will cause a narrowing the opening to both the urinary tract and the vagina.

The symptoms of this uncommon skin disease can include discomfort, intense itching, smooth white patches on one’s skin, tearing off one’s skin, and extreme pain. In some severe instances, there may also be ulcerated sores, blisters, and bleeding. Fortunately, there are treatment options.

At present, the most effective treatment is Temovate. Temovate is a powerful corticosteroid ointment also known as clobetasol. Initially, it’s applied in small quantities several times daily.  

It’s then applied less frequently as the various symptoms improve. Vyas states that even advanced conditions of this disease will improve “if treated properly and treatment is continued indefinitely.” The risk of cancer is low but regular exams for malignancies are recommended. 

In conclusion, Vyas also addressed the issue of sexual discomfort. The doctor recommends the use of an oil- or water-based sexual lubricant, or food-grade oils such as avocado, coconut, grapeseed or olive oil. If scarring limits sexual penetration, a dilator can be employed to carefully stretch the vaginal tissues in order to make coitus more comfortable.

Sex Sexual Health

The Benefits of Having Sex More Often

The Benefits of Having Sex More Often

There’s nothing better than being intimate with the one you love. Sex is a magical act that can awaken the soul and put a bounce in your step. While it feels great, did you know that there are many benefits too? It’s doing amazing things for your emotional and physical health.

Your body needs romance and intimacy, and science has proven that there are many paybacks for those who often engage in sexual activities. The relationship perks of those who are crazy for each other is evident, especially since those that are regularly intimate have lower divorce rates. However, here are a few more remunerations that you should consider.

Lower Stress Levels

People are stressed out these days. One in six adults turn to antidepressants to combat their panic and anxiety, switching to something more natural can be just what the doctor ordered.

Sexual encounters release hormones that calm the body and mind. When your anxiety levels are high, the body pumps cortisol and adrenaline as it goes into fight-or-flight mode. When you reach a state of orgasm, the body releases oxytocin, which brings about an instant calm and makes you feel contentment. Having less anxiety can increase your mood and overall outlook on life.

Get A Fun Cardiac Workout

While you may be focusing on how great it feels to be intimate, you probably didn’t realize that you were getting in quite a workout too. That’s right; sex can burn up to 250 calories. It’s a great cardio workout that gets the heart pumping.

Science shows that those who engage in sexual activities at least once a week have lower blood pressure. All this romping about opens the blood vessels wide and allows oxygen and nutrients to spread to the various cells in the body. It’s a great way to prevent heart disease and burn a few calories too.

Did you know that the average sexual encounter is equivalent to walking up two flights of stairs? If you want to tighten and tone muscles, then moving around doing the bedroom, Bossa Nova is one way to achieve it.

Have an Improved Self-Image

Self-image is something that many people struggle with, especially as they age and put on a few pounds. However, those who regularly engage in intimate acts often have higher self-esteem. Being desired does something to your psyche. It’s hard to feel bad about yourself when you are keeping the romance fires burning bright. Having a partner that makes you feel like you are special can-do wonders for your self-image.

Better Immune Function and Pain Reduction

Finally, those who have more sexual encounters have fewer problems with pain and a better immune system. Migraines and back pain can be a thing of the past when those endorphins are calming the body. Plus, your immune system is in better shape when your stress levels are down. You may find yourself with fewer colds and flu viruses just by being sexually active.

Why You Need More Intimacy?

The benefits of sex are hard to ignore. You can decrease anxiety, improve your mood, get in a good workout, and have less pain with a better immune system. The average couple has intimacy once a week, but those who engage in these activities more only see more significant benefits.

Safe Sex Sexual Health

Is It Safe to Use Saliva as a Lubricant During Sex?

Saliva We understand. You’re getting ready for a magical moment with your significant other but even though you’re enthusiastic your pleasure place is a bit dry. (Sometimes your body can’t keep up with your mind.)

Is It Safe to Use Saliva as a Lubricant During Sex?

There’s no lube handy so you improvise. You use spit or maybe your lover goes down on you so you can get the party started. Still, it might not always be safe to use saliva as a lubricant during sex.

According to the author of PCOS SOS: A Gynecologist’s Lifeline to Naturally Restore Your Rhythms, Hormones, and Happiness Ob-Gyn Dr. Felice Gersh using spit as a lubricant during sex might seem totally harmless. It’s free, natural, and readily available. Still, there are reasons why you should reconsider.

Sexually transmitted infections
Any STI you have in your mouth or throat can actually be spread to the genitals through your saliva. For example, if your lover has a herpes lesion, using his spit as a lubricant could result in your getting genital herpes. The doctor confirmed this is the way most people get genital herpes.

In this same way, you could get chlamydia, gonorrhea, HPV, trichomoniasis, and syphilis. Just like herpes, all these particular infections may not display any immediate symptoms.

Vaginal infection
Physicians can confirm that the bacteria in your saliva are nowhere near the same as the bacteria in your lady parts. Additionally, spittle has specific digestive enzymes that disassemble food. When you get these enzymes and bacteria into your private parts, they can unbalance your personal vaginal microbiome.

This can lead to the development of bacterial vaginosis or a yeast infection. These two curable albeit irritating infections occur when your balance of naturally-existing bacteria and yeast gets thrown off-kilter. The use of spit for lubricant during sex can easily alter your intimate area’s ecosystem sufficiently to set off these particular infections.

Not as good
OK. Let’s say your partner is free of disease and you needn’t worry about the risk of getting an STI. Let’s even pretend you don’t have to worry about getting a vaginal infection as well.

Regardless, the fact is medical professionals still do not advise using spit as a lube. Spittle simply does not have any innate qualities that make it a good personal lubricant. It does not have a truly slippery consistency. It also dries and evaporates very quickly.

A personal lubricant is specially made to create a slippery consistency. It recreates the slickness that’s like the natural lubricant created by your own body. Lubricants help to decrease friction.

This is important. After all, friction can create tiny tears or nicks in your private place. This can be painful and make you vulnerable to different harmful microbes.

Almost everyone has probably used spittle as a lubricant with someone at one time or another. Nevertheless, it’s not the safest or best choice. Instead, you should be sure to keep a silicone- or water-based lubricant in stock so it will always be handy when you need it.

Relationship Sex Sexual Health

When and Why is Pain Pleasurable?

The relatively recent commercial success of E. L. James’ fan fiction-come-franchise Fifty Shades of Grey has fueled a new interest in the idea of finding pleasure in pain. Fact is, lots of people have long drawn a connection between the two. The question is when and why is pain considered pleasurable?

When and Why is Pain Pleasurable?

“Hurts So Good”
The relationship between these two involves such explicit acts as dominance and submission, sadism and masochism, and bondage and discipline. These various sexual practices are more commonly known as BDSM. These practices contain an overlapping of both physical discomfort and sexual satisfaction.

Because people who enjoy rough play in the boudoir are often the subject of unwanted attention, the subject has been almost mythologized and even shrouded in mystery. Still, there are psychological and physiological explanations for this phenomenon.

It shouldn’t hurt unless you want it to . . .
It should go without saying that unless you specifically desire to experience physical discomfort as a planned part of your sexual gratification, coitus should never be painful. Unintentional physical distress could be caused by a number of different health-related reasons. These reasons include such conditions as infections or injuries of the vulva, vaginismus, and infections or injuries of the male genitalia. Should you experience any unintentional discomfort or painful sensations, consult a physician as soon as possible.

Some mutually consenting adults enjoy experiencing painful sensations during foreplay and lovemaking because they feel it enhances both their arousal and pleasure. This generally occurs during various regular BDSM activities or simply as part of an attempt to add spice to one’s love life.

How can something painful be pleasurable? Human evolutionary theory notes that painful feelings are part of a warning system that signals a potential physical threat. For example, getting burned discourages you from walking into a fire.

Pleasure and pain have a lot in common. Scientific studies have revealed that both these sensations set off the same neural mechanisms within your brain. They’re
both connected to the interacting opioid and dopamine systems inside your brain, which controls your neurotransmitters related to motivation- or reward-driven behaviors such as drinking, eating, and lovemaking.

Both painful and pleasurable sensations trigger such brain regions as the amygdala, the pallidum, and the nucleus accumbens. These areas are concerned with controlling motivation-driven behaviors and the brain’s reward system. People who find painful sensations sexually arousing feel a “high” that’s much like the “high” that athletes experience when they push themselves to their physical limit.

Fantasy to reality
Studies show that sexual fantasies about rough or unusual sex play are actually quite common. A significant number of these individuals choose to make these intimate fantasies real in the privacy of their own bedrooms. Should you and your partner choose to move beyond what some would call “normal” intercourse and experiment, have no fear.

There is nothing inherently wrong with that. Just be certain to be in total agreement. Decide on a “safe word” that you can speak in order to stop things if either of you gets uncomfortable. Otherwise, have a good time!

Safe Sex Sex Sexual Health

This Sex Survey by TickPick Shows How Satisfied You Are in the Bedroom, According to Your Taste In Music

A recent sex survey by Tickpick shows surprising information on how different genres of music express different attitudes towards sex. The kind of music you listen to most often is linked with your sexual preferences, fetishes, and how satisfied you are in the bedroom. Let’s explore this survey and its results!

The Facts About Music and Sex
TickPick surveyed 1,010 sexually active people who are avid music listeners. Here are some of the surprising results: Country fans were the most satisfied with their sex lives, coming out on top with 63% satisfaction. people who favor blues music lasted the longest in the bedroom, with an average of 16 minutes. Fans of rap and hip hop were the least likely to give oral sex. 1 in 4 folk fans have cried during sex.

Music tastes also link to whether or not people prefer to be on top or on the bottom. The survey shows that those into EDM, Reggae, Folk, Jazz, and Blues prefer to be on top. Meanwhile, those who like Country, Showtunes, Pop, Indie Rock, and Alternative are likely to be on the bottom.

Why does this happen?
The content of country music often explores sex through topics of intimacy, connection, and partnership. Romantic takes on sex that are expressed in many country songs lead to Country fans being the most satisfied. Pop fans, on the other hand, were the least satisfied with the sex. This is likely because of the repeated references to aggression and sexual pain that is often expressed in pop music. The demographics of pop music is also on the younger side, and understand sexual satisfaction less.

Music and Position Preferences
The sex survey also mentions that a person’s taste in music is linked to the sex positions they prefer. Among all music fans that were surveyed, the top 5 positions were doggy style, missionary, cowgirl, and spooning. Rap fans were more likely to enjoy doggy style, Pop fans prefer missionary, and heavy metal listeners enjoy cowgirl. Folk fans preferred spooning the most.

Music and Sexual Compatibility
Tickpick’s survey shows that couples who have similar interests in music are more satisfied in the bedroom than couples with different tastes. 79.6% of couples with similar tastes were satisfied, while only 43.6% of couples with different tastes were satisfied. Couples with similar tastes also had more monthly sex on average than those with different tastes. Those with similar tastes were 3 times more likely to listen to music during sex.

Music and Sexual Fetishes
Fans of particular music genres are more likely to have sexual fetishes. Fans of EDM, Heavy Metal, and Jazz had fetishes more often than those who like Country, Pop, and Classic Rock. Those who are into Indie Rock were most into BDSM, while Folk music fans were into role-playing.

Music plays a large role in sexual preferences and the compatibility between couples. Who knew music taste was a factor in how satisfied you are in the bedroom? Looks like psychology strikes again!

Safe Sex Sexual Health

7 Shower Sex Positions That Are Anything But Clean

Thinking about trying shower sex to keep things fresh? That could be great but remember that trying all the Kama Sutra sex positions in a slippery shower could be dangerous. So to help keep you out of the emergency room but still keep things exciting in your love life, here are seven shower sex positions that are anything but “clean.”

7 Shower Sex Positions That Are Anything But Clean

Seated Sex
The seated sex position is good for both the tub or shower. Facing the same direction, the man sits on the floor and the woman sits in his lap. This is one of the sex positions that are especially good for women because it actually allows the lady to control depth, rhythm, and speed.

Tall X
In the Tall X position, the woman faces the wall and stands with her arms and legs spread wide to form a big “X.” The man gets right behind the woman. He enters her from this standing position. A shower mat is suggested for all standing shower sex positions.

Standing Doggy
This is a variation of the Tall X standing position. The woman faces away from her partner, bends at the waist and leans against the wall. The man stands behind her entering from behind. His hands are free to reach under and forward to caress and stimulate her clitoris, breasts or even anus.

Oral Shower Sex
Oral shower sex can also be an exceptional choice for sex in the shower or even shower sex foreplay. All it takes is the natural lubrication from both of your mouths. Take turns sitting on the shower seat or the edge of your tub while you kneel and pleasure each other with your mouths and tongues.

Leg Lift
In this standing position, you stand face-to-face pressed against each other. The man lifts the woman’s leg thus allowing easier entry. In this position, you only have three feet on the shower floor. The man leans against the wall or the woman rests her foot on the tub’s edge as if she was shaving her legs.

Worried about your footing? This position allows one of you to stand “inside” the tub or shower and one of you to stand “outside” of it on the dry bathroom floor. You face each other as the woman lifts one of her legs and puts it on the edge of the tub or shower seat and even enjoy oral sex in an “inside out” position too.

The Proposal
Here the man takes a knee before the standing woman as if he is going to propose. The woman kneels closely to the man so that he can penetrate her. It’s also a great option if the man has a large penis too because the angle of entry with this position helps to avoid the discomfort sometimes caused by a well-endowed man.

Shower sex can be great if you do it right. Just remember to choose your sex positions carefully. Steady yourself with the floor wall or a shower mat so you’ll feel the love and not the pain.

Sex Sexual Health

9 Awkward Things That Happen During Sex That No One Ever Talks About

Sex. It’s that part of life that nearly everyone experiences but never truly feels comfortable talking about. The media has a way of making you feel like you’re either not doing it right or not having enough, and it can be especially difficult for people who aren’t sexually active to finally start doing the deed only to discover it’s a far cry from what you see in the movies.

Awkward things during sex can be embarrassing, but they can also be a moment to laugh and bond with your partner. These nine things are pretty common during any time of physical intimacy, and you shouldn’t let the fear of awkwardness kill the mood. Instead, learn to laugh and make memories with your partner. After all, what’s good sex if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having it with?

9 Awkward Things That Happen During Sex That No One Ever Talks About

Stray Pubic Hair

Many partners incorporate oral acts into their foreplay, but one thing no one wants to think about or deal with are stray pubic hairs that get caught on your tongue or in your teeth. It can be uncomfortable, to say the least, especially if your partner goes in for a kiss while you’re still trying to figure out how to dislodge one of the foreign hairs.

Don’t worry, though. Just use your tongue and get creative. Licking the inner thigh or kissing a bit deeper can be a good way to remove any undesirables.


One of the most awkward things that can happen during any sexual act is an unintentional fart. It may not even be the typical kind you expect; bodies rubbing together can make a lot of noise, some of which are pretty distracting and may have you asking, “Was that you?”


It seems sexy in your thoughts, but a steamy romantic interlude can quickly become sticky and gross when someone starts to sweat as they’ve just run a 5k. People who sweat easily are likely going to drip onto their partner, but it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Maybe just bring some extra towels or try less direct positions to avoid too much drippage.

Shower Action

It’s not hot, in fact, it’s downright uncomfortable. You wind up wasting water and hurting your knees trying to find the perfect position, and no one even comes out feeling refreshed. If anything, you’ll need another shower after just to regroup.

Nosy Pets

The thought of anyone watching you get it on is awkward enough, but imagine a Golden Retriever just staring you dead in the eyes while your partner mounts you from behind. Even worse, there are plenty of curious cats and dogs that like to hop on the bed and try to join in on the fun.

Make sure that you shut the door the next time you and your partner want some interrupted alone time.

Early Orgasms

It’ll happen to all of us at some point. Whether it was too much foreplay or you were just that turned on, you’re going to wind up reaching climax only a few minutes into the game. You’ll have to either kindly let your partner down and ask them to wait for another round, or you can try to finish them off.

An Uncooperative Erection

Do you know the saying that some men only think with their D? Well, ask anyone who has ever struggled to get an erection and they’ll tell you that isn’t the case. Your mind may be ready and raring for action, but your boner is nowhere to be seen.

Although this can be embarrassing, just use it as a chance to please your partner instead.


It doesn’t matter if you practiced with a banana, dildo or some other fully inanimate object; shove anything that far down your throat and you’re asking to wretch. Some people have gone so far that they’ve even thrown upon their partner. It’s gross, but it can happen. Take it slow, and don’t force yourself to go beyond your limits.

The Wet Spot

You may forget to lay down a towel when it’s time to get down and dirty, which leaves the unseemly wet spot on your sheets. Don’t be embarrassed, though. Just laugh it off and change the linens. After all, it’s only a sign that you enjoyed yourself.

A Word of Advice

Awkward things during sex can be embarrassing, but they can also be hilarious and make for some great memories later. The best way to avoid feeling humiliated during an awkward moment is to feel comfortable with the person you’re sleeping with. Never have intercourse with someone just because you feel pressured; the best sex always happens when everyone consents and is eager to please one another

Facts Sex Sexual Health

The Truth About What Happens to Your Vagina When You Haven’t Had Sex in a While

Sex can be very beneficial. It can relax you and make it easier to sleep. It can eliminate stress and even improve cardio health. But what happens to your vagina when you stop having sex? Dr. Christine Greves, an ob-gyn at Orlando Health’s center for obstetrics and gynecology in Florida, dispelled some of the rumors. 

The Truth About What Happens To Your Vagina When You Haven't Had Sex In A While

It won’t grow shut 

According to Dr. Christine Greves, your vagina won’t close. Your hymen will not grow back if you are not getting any intimate action. Your body produces progesterone and estrogen even when you are not having intercourse. 
Those hormones keep your vaginal walls not only open but flexible. Much like lotion can heal dry hands in cold weather, estrogen aids in moistening your vaginal folds which expand while you’re having sex. Your vaginal opening could, however, get smaller after a long break from sexual activity. 
Greves notes: “Over time, postmenopausal women who have a diminished supply of estrogen might notice the diameter of the vagina becoming smaller if they aren’t engaging in intercourse.” She adds: “But in my clinical experience, this usually only happens after about five [sexless] years or more.” 

It could get drier 

Your vaginal walls are actually supple and moist even when you are not sexually excited. Nevertheless, if you have not done the horizontal bop lately, your “dainty down there” could be on the arid side as you go about your busy day. While being dry is not a medical issue, it could feel somewhat uncomfortable. 
To avoid dryness, set aside some time to masturbate. If you masturbate on a regular basis the dryness will not be as likely to occur. The sexual stimulation will increase your natural moisture. 

Your sex drive might be impacted 

Greves reports that sustained abstinence will potentially lower your libido. Why? Possibly because if you’re not making love, you’re also not really feeling as sensual as you do when you are intimately active. That change can negatively impact your sex drive. Luckily, once you’re doing the deed again, you will feel sexier which will give your libido a boost. 

Arousal may take longer 

Doctor Greves states that after any period of abstinence, it could “take more time for you to get sufficiently lubricated or for the tissues to fully relax.” Your love glove automatically kicks into arousal mode when you’re doing the deed regularly. When you go without it for too long, though, you’ll need more foreplay before you’re able to get back into the game again. 
This is a good reason to take your private time slowly. Be sure to do a lot of hugging, kissing, and touching again. Put the focus on foreplay. 
Greves says this will aid in the relaxation of your vaginal tissues. It will also encourage natural lubrication. Be prepared though and use lubricated condoms and have some personal lubricant handy as well. 
Forget the rumors. There’ll be no “vagina odor” or anything else out of the ordinary. More importantly, you know what steps to take if you find yourself out of the coital loop, too.