How many times have you noticed an older, distinguished-looking man with a hot young blonde on his arm? Probably a lot, right? So tell me, why do people often ask me if I’m the mother when they see me out with my younger man? Sure, “All you need is love,” said The Beatles, but let me tell you what my life with boyfriend – who is younger than I am- is REALLY like.
The first time it really hit me that my relationship was looked at differently was in a local restaurant. My boyfriend, who is just about 12-years younger than I am, was waiting for me at a popular Italian restaurant that had just opened up. I was running late and told him to just grab a table before it got too busy. When I finally came running in, hair out of place and definitely out of breath, the server spotted me and headed over as I plopped into the seat across from him.
What was her greeting, you ask? What did she have the nerve to say?
“Hi there! Awwww, how sweet- are you on a mother-son date?”
The glare and shock in my eyes stopped her from saying anything else, as I think she realized her mistake pretty quickly after she said it. She laughed nervously and launched into a spiel about the dinner specials, cocktails, and how nice of a day it was. My boyfriend, looking all hot and wonderful, was unfazed. But I surely was not.
Unfortunately, that is what they call “life with boyfriend” when he is younger AND hotter than you. While men flaunt their hot, young girlfriends around town with their head held high, prepared for high-fives and winks from other men, us older women pray we aren’t mistaken for the mothers of our younger men. It’s frustrating and quite frankly, demeaning.
We are all so conditioned to think that we have to date within the same general age group as ourselves. While age gaps are a very real part of the dating scene, it is still unusual for the public to react normally when they see a younger man with an older lady. Even if they don’t say anything to our faces, we know that they are likely making comments behind our backs.
This is especially true for women who are dating younger men who are also hot and who have a fit, trim body. Some people look at that type of relationship and wonder why on earth the man picked an older woman for a girlfriend. They must have “mommy issues” or are looking for a free ride. However, let a man walk in with gray in his hair and a young woman holding his hand and no one questions it at all.
What I think is sad is that too many men may not let themselves date an older lady, even if the chemistry is there, because they are worried about how society will perceive their relationship. They won’t want to hear that they could do better from friends and family. I’m just hoping that it’s true that younger men dating older women is on the rise.
But don’t worry. I’m staying with my younger, handsome boyfriend no matter what people think of us. Even if people do think I’m his mother. Because what they don’t know is just how good I have it when the bedroom doors are closed.