How To Become the Person You Were Meant to Be
By Andre Carvajal
Edited By: Stephanie Dawson
A common obstacle you will find in the path of life is resistance to change. This is an inner voice, part of your self-dialogue that will tell you things like this is impossible, it can’t be done, or its too difficult. This inner voice is the personification of your fears, the origin of this voice are often family and societal values that keep you looking for comfort zones. There are myths and judgments that keep us from our full development. You can change and replace myths and judgments about yourself.
The principle is simple, actions and thoughts change who we are. We act according to who we are but we are defined by our actions. If we have a friend that is often optimistic we say, “She is a happy person.” If we look closer, this person does things that happy people do, smiling more, thinking positively, finding new sense of life, using humor, and generous with others. This reveals that the actions someone performs can turn a person into anything he wants. A happy person is happy because the sum of particular actions make him radiant.
How can you use that principle and becoming who you want to be?
Suppose you are shy, and you want to overcome it. You probably start with the belief, “I’m a shy person.” This belief hinders opportunity to change because you are defining yourself as that. Changing your thoughts by just convincing yourself is not the best option for most people. Some people can start change only by acting. From a pragmatic point of view this could be a better definition, “I am acting like a shy person,” this is different than labeling yourself a shy person. This new definition gives new perspectives of change. Pay attention to the actions you are performing that make you shy, choose new actions that can make you become a new being, the one you want to become. You can start defining your new self by describing the opposite of a shy person, a confident person. Think about the actions a confident person uses.
• Working at personal growth in order to know themselves, to discover self-worth
• Their body language expresses confidence. They look and sit straight, they are not afraid of looking into the eyes of another and they smile a lot.
• Spending time learning from others or taking courses or seminars
• Practicing the art of speaking and expressing a point
The following is a good recipe for becoming who you want to be
• Be clear who you want to be, professional, personal, or emotional goals. Try to set clear rules and you will have more motivation for change.
• Get a log, diary or blog to track your observations, plans, and ideas regarding your dreams.
• Set long, middle, and short-term actions for new habits.
• Learn from people that are in the place you want to be. Try to discover their habits and actions, don’t be afraid to emulate them.
• Look for a mentor or teacher, once you have that person identified, consult and ask for help.
• Learn new things and enjoy new activities, even if they are not related to your goals.