5 Ways You’re Being Unfaithful to Your Partner Without Even Realizing It
You’re in a good, committed relationship. You’re in love with each other and you don’t care who knows it. So why is it, then, that things feel rocky? You find yourself growing closer to someone else, and you aren’t even sure when it started. Perhaps you’ve made your partner angry and aren’t even completely sure where you stepped over the line. Here you’ll find five ways that you cheat without even realizing it–and relationship advice that will steer you straight again.
1. Sending texts, emails, or other messages that you wouldn’t want your partner to read. Here’s a safe rule of thumb: if you wouldn’t want your partner to read it, you probably shouldn’t be sending it. It would take some serious relationship counseling to fully set out the boundaries concerning what’s considered acceptable in your relationship and what isn’t, but here’s a good rule of thumb: if you find yourself deleting messages, hiding your phone from your partner, or being glad they don’t have the password to an account, you’re probably sending something you shouldn’t be. This is especially true in reference to pictures or other suggestive material.
2. Dressing up for someone else. If you’re putting on that flirty little dress and killer pair of heels for the few minutes your partner will see you in them in the morning and in the evening after work, that’s fine. Wearing them for yourself? Also acceptable. If you find yourself dressing with someone else in mind, however, you’re already starting to inch over that line. The same goes for men: if you’re reaching more often for the shirt you know that girl in the office likes, you might be in danger of crossing the line.
3. Sharing things with someone else that you aren’t comfortable sharing with your partner. This is, of course, primarily in reference to members of the opposite sex. There are things that you share with your closest friends that it might take you longer to tell your partner. If, however, you find yourself confiding more freely in a member of the opposite sex than you do your partner, you’ve probably already crossed the line into an emotional affair.
4. Flirting with someone who isn’t your partner. This could include being a little too effusive with the compliments, buying a drink for someone of the opposite sex, or more overt attempts at flirting. Flirting should, in general, be reserved for your partner. Sure, it’s fun and innocent to exchange a few flirty compliments at the copy machine; but it can also be the beginning of something that will get out of hand.
5. Failing to hold your relationship sacred. Your relationship with your partner should remain above your relationship with your parents and children. It also shouldn’t be shared with your opposite-sex friends. If you find yourself placing someone else against your partner, you’re already on your way to an emotional affair. This includes “forgetting” to mention that you are in an established relationship to someone of the opposite sex or taking someone else to a place that is special to you and your partner: little things that can have a huge emotional impact on the one you love.